Show Notes
Hi friends, and welcome back to the podcast.
Today’s episode is a special behind-the-scenes look at a live application review I did with Anna, a high school senior I met last year. We recorded this about ten days before her early deadlines, and she was kind enough to let me walk through her entire application in real time: her personal statement, her activities list, and all of her supplemental essays for Yale.
Fun fact: Anna emailed me a couple months later to let me know she actually got into Yale (congrats again, Anna!).
In this episode, we get into:
- What it was like for Anna to pivot away from a topic that wasn’t serving her (ten drafts about her favorite socks, which started to sound like a list)
- Her pivot to a new topic: Trivial Pursuit, a board game that’s close to my heart
- A live read-through of her final personal statement, which touches on family, curiosity, and community
- How applying test-optional led her to sprinkle a few more high-level academic moments into her writing
- Her supplemental essays for Yale, including her “why us” essay and an academic prompt essay
Anna is a recent high school graduate who loves cooking, sustainable agriculture, and spending time in nature. When she’s not cross-country skiing with her school team, she’s mentoring friends in the library or volunteering at her local synagogue.
Whether you’re a student navigating this process right now, or a parent or counselor supporting students from the sidelines, I hope you find this useful.
Hope you enjoy our conversation.
Play-by-Play
- 1:58 – Ten days from her early deadlines, how is Anna feeling?
- 2:33 – When did Anna start working on her essays, and how much time has she put in?
- 3:35 – What has Anna learned about herself through this process?
- 4:26 – Anna walks through her journey to finding a personal statement topic
- 8:10 – Anna reads her personal statement
- 12:35 – What values are coming through in Anna’s personal statement?
- 14:26 – What questions does Anna have about her essay?
- 19:23 – Ethan reviews Anna’s activities list and additional information section
- 21:33 – Anna reads her “Why Yale” essay
- 23:14 – What academic opportunities and programs excite Anna about Yale?
- 29:06 – Anna reads her “Why Major” essay
- 31:25 – How can Anna weave more specific, “geeky” language into her soil health essay?
- 38:48 – The short takes: four 200-character response
- 38:48 – What inspires you?
- 42:28 – A course, book, or piece of art you’d create
- 47:14 – A significant influence outside your family
- 48:56 – Something not included elsewhere in your application
- 56:44 – Anna reads her community essay
- 1:02:35 – How Anna might sharpen the essay with a couple more specific details?
- 1:04:41 – Closing thoughts
Resources
- How to Write the Yale Supplemental Essays: Guide + Examples
- CEG’s College Admission Nutrients (aka The Great College Application Test)
- College Essay Guy’s Personal Statement Resources
- College Essay Guy’s College Application Hub
Show transcript
Ethan Sawyer (00:00) Hi friends and welcome back to the College Essay Guy Podcast. So today's episode is a special behind-the-scenes look at a live application review that I did with a student named Anna, who is a high school senior that I met last year. We recorded the session about 10 days before her early deadlines. And she was kind enough to let me walk through her entire application in real time. We walked through her personal statement, her activities list, all of her supplemental essays for Yale. And fun fact, She emailed me a couple months later and let me know that she actually got into Yale, which was rad. So we walk through in particular what it was like to pivot away from a topic that she felt just wasn't really serving her. She actually did 10 drafts about her favorite socks and then realized it was just sort of sounding like a list. So she pivoted to a new topic on Trivial Pursuit, which is a board game that is close to my heart. And on the episode, we do a live read-through of the final personal statement. She talks about her family and curiosity and community. It's really lovely. We also talked about how she was applying test optional and how that led her to sprinkling in a few more, we'll call them like high-level academic moments into her writing. And then we got into her supplemental essays, her why us essay, and even an academic prompt. So whether you're a student who's navigating this process right now, or you're a parent or a counselor who's supporting students from the sidelines, I hope you find this useful. Anna is a recent high school graduate who loves cooking, sustainable agriculture, and spending time in nature. When she's not cross-country skiing with her school team, she's mentoring friends in the library or volunteering at her local synagogue. Hope you enjoy our conversation. Well hi Anna. Welcome to the podcast. Anna (01:54) Hi Ethan. I'm so excited to be talking with you today. Ethan Sawyer (01:58) Yeah, thanks for being here. I'm just to check in. I'd love to just hear it's we're just like ten days or so from these early deadlines. How are you feeling? And I want you to feel free to be honest here, but like how's it going? Anna (02:11) I feel very jittery. When I get excited and nervous, I feel like my whole body is shaking. I feel like this past week I've just been like almost as if I've drink drinking like too much caffeine. Like trying to s like I'm definitely like taking care of my mental health and like making sure I'm sleeping and exercising. But there's definitely a lot to do. So yeah. Ethan Sawyer (02:33) Yeah. Well, thanks for the opportunity to go through these essays with you. And I and I'd love to hear just a little bit about how the process has gone for you in writing these. Like when did you start? How much have you worked on them to get to this point? Anna (02:48) So at the end of June, I started the College SA Guy personal statement summer course. And then after that I went into the whole application, like supplemental one. And but I started thinking about even like last spring, I started like brainstorming like ideas of like my personal statement, not about like supplementals. I would say I've spent Especially in the summer. I've spent a lot more time than I hope the average person is spending on their essays. Just because I'm someone who like takes a lot of time to process things and I like it's not like just about like how perfectly written the essay is. It's like I want the right topic. So yeah. Ethan Sawyer (03:35) What do you feel like you've learned about yourself in this process? Anna (03:39) I've learned a lot, even like the value, like the f one of the first exercises you do, like the values. Like I feel like throughout my life I've thought about what I value, but not in like a concrete way, like, I'm gonna write it down. Like over the summer, I told myself like every single week I would do the values exercise just to like see how it changed. And it's crazy, like depending on like my mood too, like the values would drastically change. And I've definitely learned that. I have a lot of values and like especially with the essays, there's so many things I could talk about that I just need to let go some perfectionism that I have and like know that there's a lot of different essays that could be my quote unquote best essay. Ethan Sawyer (04:26) So Anna, before we get into the personal statement, I'd love to know, tell me just like a little bit about the journey or the arc to finding a topic. Like, how did that go for you? Anna (04:36) So I did lots of brainstorming and tried lots of different drafts, but one of the drafts that I stuck with for a while, I kept editing it, was about don't have socks, which is a brand of socks that's a like a very Vermont thing, but I'm sure it's like spread out of places. And how like it was mostly focusing on like being a Vermonter and being like really outdoorsy. And like how these socks, like in a montage essay way, like connect to different parts of my life. And how like my skiing socks, my running socks, my hiking socks all represent different things. And I ended up leaning away from it just because I felt like I you were really getting like, wow, outdoor enthusiasts, which is awesome. But I didn't want that to be my whole personage statement because I knew that there was so much more that I wanted to say and weave in there. So I ended up trying a lot of different things and then in October I wrote this essay on trivial pursuit. Ethan Sawyer (05:40) Yeah. What ended up do you feel like working better with the trivial pursuit idea for you than the socks idea? Anna (05:50) I think the socks was naturally a little bit more surface level. And it felt like me either like listing my activities in different ways, or like even like non-activities, just like parts of myself, it felt more like a list and I couldn't figure out how to make it flow in the way I wanted. So I tried a lot of montage essays and it just wasn't working for me. So eventually I was like, okay, this isn't working. So then I tried the narrative essay for a long time. And I didn't like the idea of like sticking with one story either and like exploding the moment. I I it like also wasn't working, so then I was like, I'm gonna find like some sort of in between. And I found that I did well with the in between. Ethan Sawyer (06:36) So too. Yeah. There's something about trivial pursuit that not only is it something that has like multiple parts that you could connect to, but it seemed like it was like a key for you into these like it opened you up in a particular way to these other aspects of yourself that felt more what? I don't know. It it seemed like it it it it did something for you. It opened you up in a particular way. What do you know what I'm talking about? Anna (07:03) Yeah, it definitely felt more authentic and vulnerable because I remember like I had it was on like my tenth draft of the Darn Def Stock essay and I like gave it to my dad and I was like, this feels not like me. This does not even feel like my voice at this point. Like I knew with this trivial pursuit essay, I like I when I wrote it, I was like, I'm not doing more than five drafts of this one. Because I know for me, like once I get beyond that. then like my voice, like it doesn't even sound like me at that point. And it gets like overly edited. And with the don't have stock one, like, it just like wasn't coming naturally. And that's this is what I would say to like anyone who's trying to write their portion of a statement is that like if it obviously like the first draft is tough for everyone. But if at a certain point it's so tough that you like really can't it's you're really forcing it forcing it, then maybe you try a different topic. Ethan Sawyer (08:00) I love that advice. I'd love to just hear it aloud. And I'm curious, I I can read it or I'd love to hear it in your voice. Either way works for me. Do you have a preference? Anna (08:10) I can read it. Ethan Sawyer (08:11) Okay, great. Go for it. Anna (08:14) On Saturday afternoons, my family gathers around a wooden dinner table, scratched from years of Yachty scores and late-night arts and crafts projects. At this table, we play many board games, but Trivial Pursuit is the one that has taught me the most about building curious communities. I open the box and trace my fingers across the bronze lettering of the logo. The scent of popcorn and mac and cheese was from the box. What can I say? After morning services at synagogue, we get hungry. I'm pink, Renee is purple, Sophie's yellow, mom is blue, and dad never cares what color he is. Renee, our self appointed question master, reads which is not a room and clue? Conservatory, cellar, kitchen, or ballroom? Cellar, I answer confidently. I know my board games. She grins. Okay, tougher one. Which vegetable is not in the Brasco family? Kale, artichoke, mustard, or brussels sprouts. I shrugged, no idea. I glance at Sophie and say with my eyes, tell us about it. She launches into a detailed tangent about the wild mustard plan, explaining how selective breeding led to kale, broccoli, and brussels sprouts. I smile. It makes me happy to hear someone speak with such enthusiasm about something they love. Every time I come across something I don't understand, Someone in my family is there with an explanation, never just an answer. Grandpa Lenny turned our kitchen table into a chemistry lab. Dads lit objects on the office table to teach Newton's laws. Renee and Sophie taught me to watercolor at the dining table. Like playing trivial pursuit, these tables were the launching point for discovery. I grew up in a family that celebrates curiosity, where why is never an interruption but an invitation. When I was younger, I did not realize that not everyone has that. Some people don't have a family who plays board games or an older sibling who can help them with any subject. So at school I try to be that older sibling figure. In the library, I sit down to do homework, but usually end up helping friends or new faces, retrigonometry, history essays, or really anything else. Our conversations often drift into different things. Favorite hiking trails, debates over tea or coffee. We trade stories and our unfiltered laughter sometimes turns heads. I've learned that curiosity is not just a trait, it's a practice of empathy, of reaching beyond yourself to understanding something or someone more deeply. This allows for us all to sit at the table together, and even with different experiences, beliefs, and opinions, we find our place. I also help others more formally, as a teacher's assistant in AP chemistry and as a religious school teacher at my synagogue. But the casual library moments are the most meaningful for me because, like playing trivial pursuit with my family, I've learned that anyone and everyone can shape a community where knowledge is to be shared and learning is a joyful celebration. These moments in the library remind me that meaningful work doesn't always look grand. Sometimes it's as simple as listening deeply, offering encouragement, or helping someone understand a tricky concept. To these simple yet meaningful connections, whether I'm explaining a chemistry problem, unpacking the themes of a novel, or discussing why Kale and Brussels wraps are distinct cousins, thank you, Sophie, that I find the same sense of belonging I feel around my family table playing board games. In my family and now beyond, knowledge is never a wedge, but a bridge. And it all started with a pink game piece, a wooden table, and a question I didn't know the answer to. Soon I will be packing for college and I will make sure to squeeze in as many board games as I can fit, but if I can only pick one, I'll bring trivial pursuit. Ethan Sawyer (12:06) Just lovely. I'm like smiling as I read this. You're smiling too. Why are you smiling? Anna (12:13) I feel like it really like I did like the exercise where you like highlight all the values that show up in your essay or maybe even your like whole almost done doc. I printed it out and highlighted it. So I don't have it online, but I feel like it reflects my values and it I show a lot of different values. Yeah. So I'm happy with that. Ethan Sawyer (12:35) Yeah. You know, I'm so with you as you say that. I was tracking as we were as I was listening to you all the values. We we don't need to name all of them, but will you walk us through some of the values that you're seeing coming through in this essay? Anna (12:49) Yeah, totally. I think I was worried initially it would just be about family and curiosity, which are definitely coming through, but also community, empathy, meaningful work, spirituality, helping others, probably more that I'm like laughter, yeah, like connection, those sort of ones. Yeah. Ethan Sawyer (13:16) So with you here. I really agree. I'm seeing a lot of the ones, you know, the admission nutrients that I talk about, you know, things like intellectual curiosity, which you mentioned already. And yeah, so much. There's so much here. I mean, it's just I also really sense, and this is like something we don't often talk about, but I sense that you really like hanging out with your family. And I know that's not like a sort of like, well, that's gonna help you get into college, but There's a real enjoyment of you. It sounds like you doing something that you love. And I can feel that sort of that warmth coming through here. Anna (13:53) Yeah, I I hope so too. I think what really is yes, I love hanging out with family. I just really love talking to people. So I wanted to like show how like being with my family and like how we all like we like love talking. Like I'm just like a big talker. But I think my whole family is. And then like transitioning to like how at school and definitely other places as well. I'm a talker. I'm also a listener, which isn't like super coming up in this, but like maybe a little bit. I just love like connection. Ethan Sawyer (14:26) As you read this, what questions do you have for an outside viewer or listener, as it were? Anna (14:37) What questions do I have? Wait, could you Ethan Sawyer (14:39) Yeah, like is there anything you wonder about it? Like, do you wonder if there's like, hey, is X, you know, too, you know, something or is this part too something or is something missing? Like any, I just wonder if there's anything that you're, you know, curious to know about. I mean, I can walk you through everything I love about it, but I just wonder, you know, is there anything that you wonder about it? Anna (15:02) I would be curious, maybe this is just my worry. Is this person going to be independent and strong enough alone on a college campus? Like are they too attached to their family? Which I hope isn't coming through. But that was definitely a thought of mine when I was writing it. Ethan Sawyer (15:26) Yeah. You know, it didn't occur that didn't occur to me. there's no part of me that goes like, wait a minute, this person likes their family too much. If that was if that were a concern, you could, you know, find a moment or two to weave in just how independent you are. So let me just ask you, like, do you consider yourself to be an independent person? Anna (15:48) I'm super independent. Like, I'm the youngest of three daughters. Like, I feel like just as a youngest kid, like nature, like I'm very rebellious at heart and I am independent. I just want, I think I I think we were talking about this, like, I want to change my conclusion slightly to seem like not that mine's super cliche right now, but maybe changing it so it's more like authentic to me and really who I am gonna be in the next chapter of my life. Ethan Sawyer (16:22) Yeah. I mean, the simple follow-up I would ask is like, if it's true that you are independent, you know, could you weave in a couple examples of that in your in your essay? I mean, you you do note here that you try to be the older sibling figure. And the way that you're externally focused and relating to others shows me that, you know, that sort of leadership quality, I guess I would call it, but also that ability to take care of not only yourself, but take care of others. Yeah. So I'll just name that I think it's and anybody who's a teacher's assistant sort of has been seen as someone who is, you know, trustworthy to be working with with younger folks. So, you know, I see it signaled there twice. But if you were worried about it, you could just weave it in one more place if you wanted to. Anna (17:12) Yeah, okay. Ethan Sawyer (17:14) One thing that I really like about this essay is that there in in the past a student chose Trivial Pursuit to write about, and they cleverly chose, you know, each color represented a different side of themselves, which I think could work. You've done a slightly different thing here, and it's a little bit more sort of the themes are f family, like you said, games and sort of the way that you interact around the game. So it's less this sort of like structured like each paragraph represents a different. Pie piece, but you've done a nice job with some of the transitions to make sure that the the ideas flow from one to the next. And I'm guessing that took you some time. Anna (17:53) Yes. I I think my first draft was like three pages long. So, you know, it definitely took me some time. I I didn't realize that I was going to do this structure, which is more like kind of like a story, like of a book, I would say. Like more like book style. Like I read it to one of my friends at one point and they were like, This sounds like a book. And I was like, you know, now that you say that, I kind of agree. And that definitely took some time because I tried a lot with the montage and it just wasn't working for me. Like the idea of like switching to like a whole nother side kind of abruptly, obviously with transitions, like just didn't like sit well with me for some reason. Ethan Sawyer (18:41) Totally. Well, you've done a a beautiful job of it where it's still clear that the theme is, in this case, trivial pursuit. You start with it, you know, it's woven into the first few paragraphs. So far, right now, you're ending the essay with those words. So it kind of it g it has that anchoring presence where I sense the craft in it and I sense that you really took care of the reader and took care to like be like, Here's what I want you to know about me. And so I sense that throughout. So and and I love that you sort of did go with that's the the first impulse on the form. I think that's that's beautiful. Yeah. So I'd I'd kind of love to move to the other parts of the application, if that'd be okay. Anna (19:20) Yeah, totally. Cool. This is my activities list. Ethan Sawyer (19:23) Your activities list is looking really good. I'm just gonna name for folks some of these activities so they have a sense of the other stuff that you've been involved with. So you've been involved with youth orchestra, varsity tennis, and you've got some nice weave-ins here of ways that you've communicated with teams and coaches and organizing carpools. So it's beyond just like playing tennis. You've got some clubs that you're a part of, you know, you've been a teacher at the temple, you've been a part of the school farm to school program. leadership council, even playing music. So there's like a little something of you know all these different elements of sort of like community service. There's also leadership. You're showing, you know, involvement in sports and extracurricular. So it's just a really lovely range here. Even, you know, some writing work that you've done here, a member of the Young Writers Project, which is really cool. So I don't really have many notes on that. I think it's just looking really good. And then you've got a couple different mentions, you know, being part of the rural and small town, you know, this is like a particular award that you won. What was this award for? Anna (20:27) Honestly not entirely sure. I got it from college board at the end of my junior year. And I was like, okay. Ethan Sawyer (20:35) Is this just for being an awesome rural or small town student? Anna (20:40) think the award was for my SAT or PSAT score. I'm not entirely sure which one. Ethan Sawyer (20:45) Got it. In the additional information section, you've noted a couple things or a couple of awards that didn't fit, you know, that makes sense to put here. Sometimes students put only academic awards, which f which is fine. And then you could put additional awards as you've done any additional info. And then you mention tennis practice outside of what you've done in in high school, which is great. So I'd love to move to your supplemental essays. In particular, this is a school that you're excited about, Yale, and it's due real soon. So let's go through these supplements. And I've got some notes for these. I have some things to share. to work on. I'm gonna promise not to give you things that I don't think are done, you know, able to be done in the next few days. So So the first one asks, Reflect on how your interests, values and or experiences have drawn you to Yale. And you've got 125 words. I'll let you read it. You read aloud and then I'll and then I'll share some thoughts. Anna (21:33) Okay. I love Yale's wide variety of student-led communities that foster engagement and belonging. I will seek such communities by participating in Slivka's Egalitarian Services, Family Like Shabbat Dinners, and Deepop's student-led orchestra. At Yale Farm, I will get my hands dirty, discuss issues regarding sustainable agriculture, and brainstone ways for us to connect with the larger New Haven community. Yale's residential colleges embody the same spirit of community and leadership. They create a close-knit environment within the larger university where students support one another academically and socially. Within my residential college, I will build connections through intramural sports, the warm dining hall environment, and the collaborative academic culture that mirrors the inclusive student-driven energy that makes Yale feel both expansive and like home. Ethan Sawyer (22:27) Cool. Okay. What do you think of this one so far? What do you like about it? Or what do you not like about it or what do you think needs to work? Anna (22:35) 125 words is so tough. I tried to fit in some of the things that really attracted me to Yale, like Depop's Orchestra and the Yale Farm and the Residential College System and Slivka, like the Jewish Life Center. Like those are some of the things that like really attract me and I included all those things I could definitely like reword it for sure. Mm-hmm. I I find the Why Us essays very tough for sure. Ethan Sawyer (23:14) So I'm curious, what is your what major are you checking the box for at Yale when you apply? Anna (23:19) Environmental studies. Ethan Sawyer (23:21) Okay. Cool. So one of the things that, and we're going to get into environmental studies a little bit in the next essay, just just preview for the listener. One of the things that I wonder about as I hear this, as I read this essay, you know, hear it from you, read it on the page, is how what are the academic opportunities that interest you, that excite you? Because I think you're doing a beautiful job of talking about community. And you've listed some really wonderful examples. And that's in keeping with the theme that you've got going so far. But part of me wonders, just as a sort of orienting thing, if there's a possibility to bring in and I this is also just a I'll just name a bias that I have, that when applying to these academic institutions, I think they want to hear a little bit about some of the academics. So I wonder just to ask you right now, and then you can go, you know, tweak this later, but what excites you academically? Are there particular programs or courses or anything that you're really excited about at Yale before we even get into community stuff? Anna (24:21) Well, at the Yale Farm, I could definitely elaborate. Like, there's a lot of classes and a lot of professors that learn on the farm, which I find really cool, like hands-on learning. And with the graduate school, there's lots of overlap with the undergrad of classes and professors you can work with and potentially doing research around sustainable agriculture. Which I tried to tie in academics a little bit more into tell us about a topic or idea that excites you and going a little bit into like the academics of in specifically environmental studies. But I wonder if I could tie some more of that into this one. And also like the school of public policy and the graduate like the graduate school. And like I'm also interested in public policy and like environmental policy. And like being able to take classes in both those things and not being like tied down to one major is important to me. Ethan Sawyer (25:23) Want to just like you hear me saying, ooh, like I think bringing that here could be really nice. Yeah. Because I noticed that a lot of the essay is focused on community and I love the specifics. But I want to say, I want you to bring the academics early on here. You mentioned, you know, related to your major. You might even mention your major here early on, potentially. And then the fact that you're interested in public policy, you know, and the and the opportunities that Yel's going provide related to that feels like an important First chunk that I'll I'll I'll call your first part of things. I don't know if it's just to give you a sense of how much. I don't know if it's the first third of the essay or the first half. But the things that I think are really worth keeping. Yale Farm feels like it's going to be uncommon because not every school has its farm and it's directly connected to your major. So big thumbs up to that. I love some of these communities that you're mentioning connecting with. So big thumbs up to that. I think some of the stuff that you could potentially and I think mentioning residential college, because that's a big part of Yale. Could be cool. It's connected community. But some of the other stuff, I think you could potentially trim. If there's anything that you feel in this essay that another student might say, I think you can trim it. Is there anything that you notice as you scan this essay? Are there any sentences that you're like, yeah, I could see some mother student saying that? Anna (26:43) Honestly, anything about the residential college, I didn't know how to word it like anything beyond within my residential college. Like I want like I want to somehow make it specific to me, but I almost wonder if I shouldn't mention it at all. Like, or maybe like I do like a list sort of thing in one sentence of like all the ways, like I don't know, like a fine community, like blank, blank, blank, blank. Because I think that a lot of people are attracted to the residential college system for the same reasons that I am. Ethan Sawyer (27:16) Love this idea. And I I think that it's one of those things like, I mean, yes. So just to affirm what you're saying, yes, a lot of students talk about the residential colleges and the Y LSAs. Kind of like in Columbia, when they're writing to Columbia, they talk about New York City. Now, the challenge is like you don't want to just not talk about it because you want to be different, because then they might, it might, that might be a little weird to like not mention it. So I think mentioning it briefly is a great idea and connecting to community, great. And you can imagine almost almost imagine that. This essay is sort of like, imagine that it's like a bullet point that's on community. And you've got three or four examples, I'm just picking a number, of like, here's how Yale will help you find community. Yeah. So that's one way of sort of conceptualizing this. And then there's this whole chunk before that that's like, but let's talk about academics. Now, I don't have a strong preference which order you go in. You could go community first. Anna (28:01) Yeah. Ethan Sawyer (28:14) And then be like, but then academics or academics first and then community. I think either of those can work. But I think just, you know, getting both in is gonna important. And the different specifics of like even before you even mention the farm, I think the farm will be sort of like if you let's say you put academics first, a second example of you. I mean, I the farm actually feels like an example of both. Where it's like the academics and community. So that's kind of cool. Anna (28:43) Totally. Because like there's there's like the educational aspect and then just like making friends and like Friday pizza nights and stuff like that. Ethan Sawyer (28:52) So I'll just, you know, let that be what it's gonna be. But my main note here, bring in academics in the first part. Or if you decide to go community first, definitely bring it strongly in the in the second half of the essay. Anna (29:04) Okay. Ethan Sawyer (29:06) Let's go to the next one. Tell us about a topic or idea that excites you and is related to one or more academic areas you selected above. Why are you drawn to it? So I'd love to hear this one too. So this one's two hundred words. Anna (29:19) Again, I am fascinated by soil health because it is the foundation of sustainable agriculture and food systems. Ethan Sawyer (29:26) Pause right there. Sorry to interrupt you, but like that is a differentiator because no one else is going to be given their essay, which I am fascinated by soil health because it is the foundation of sustainable agriculture and food systems. So I just want to like name that as like, as you're thinking about what's going to help me stand out at Yale, like, there you go. And so I don't know to what extent this gets woven into like your other essays, but I do think that this is an uncommon thing. And I think that. I I'm just excited about it. So I'm just like putting it in bold and like pausing to be like, Yes, this. Okay. Anna (30:02) Okay, awesome. Okay. Okay, good. I see the urgency of this workforce hand in Vermont, where increased precipitation from climate change is degrading soil health, threatening local food production and security. My curiosity began in kindergarten at Shelburne Farms and grew through my school's farm to school program. As novice farmers trying to create more sustainable food systems, we sell our organic produce at the local farmers market. There we learn so much by engaging with farmers, educators, and policy makers about sustainable agricultural practices like rotational grazing, composting, and minimal tillage. I've learned how essential community engagement is for effective public policy and large scale change. I want to study this intersection at Yale by majoring in environmental studies with a certificate in food, agriculture and climate change. I am eager to work at the Yale Farm, attend Seed to Salad and Chewing the Fat Talks, and collaborate with peers in ENST two hundred forty five, Environmental Politics and Law, Yale's combination of hands on farming, environmental advocacy, and policy engagement will allow me to further explore my wide reaching fascination with soil. Ethan Sawyer (31:19) Cool. Okay. What do you notice about this one as you read it, as you as you sort of hear yourself read it aloud? Anna (31:25) like this one. I'm sure that you're gonna have like some great points about this one. But I do think that I like how I tie in from a young age I have been like in the door. Like we have like a garden at my house and like I've been like gardening with my dad since I was little and like I went to kindergarten on a farm like literally and now like like tying then into like high school and how like I'm still like really involved with sustainable agriculture. And how that like relates to so much more than just like farming. It's like we all depend on food and it's so important. And then in the last paragraph I tried to like mostly focus on like at Yale, how will I continue like be being like, I don't know, like so fascinated by soil. Ethan Sawyer (32:16) Yeah. I really like this too. And I'm, you know, my my notes are gonna be somewhat minor here, but I do have a thought about the middle paragraph. So I the opening I think is really strong where you say, Here's what I'm interested in particular, and you connect it to your, you know, work, you know, the work that you've been doing, or work that you've seen first hand, as you say in Vermont. You know, I appreciate that you trace w how you've sort of seen this play out in your life. In the second paragraph, you name some topics of things like rotational grazing, composting, and minimal tillage. And I really like that. I think that there's a potential here for a slight up level. And what I mean by up level is like, I imagine that you've been thinking about this much more than I'll just say, like that I have. And there are some little particular things that you've seen that I don't see. And there are particular maybe questions that you've asked that I've never even thought to ask. And so I wonder if there's if you imagined. yourself as a graduate student at Yale writing this. I wonder what sort of the grad student in you would be talking about and how there's like tiny tweaks to like a couple sentences could get us to sit back and be like, dang. Like Anna's really been thinking about this a lot. Now, I already do have that. So I think that you're like six out of 10 there. Okay. And I think that there's already like a real Like even the topics that you're mentioning. Like I don't know a lot about rotational grazing. So even that is sort of already in the in this direction. But there might just be a couple tweaks about, I mean, I don't want to ask too many leading questions here, but like what's key? You you mentioned here how essential community engagement is for effective public policy and large scale change. Like you're hinting at something, and I'm like wanting you to just take it one step further. I know you're tight on the word count here, but it's like with these couple sentences in here. There might be some tiny tweaks to get us to go from like, yeah, I could totally see, you know, you know, Anna coming in and being able to like hold her own in these conversations and Yell classrooms to like, ooh, I think Anna could lead some of these conversations. And it's just tiny details of language, getting into probably maybe some of the specifics. So I like to call this like geeky language here. So Anna (34:32) Yeah, I agree. I think that the middle paragraph could be more specific. Like some of my sentences are kind of broad. And I think that if even like when I write, a lot of times I like weave in questions into my writing. So I wonder if like almost weaving into a question into this paragraph would be like the right move. Ethan Sawyer (34:55) I think that could be super cool. I think that could be super cool. Yeah. For the last paragraph, you you I noticed, you know, the thing that I talked about mentioning your major. You're doing it here, which is nice. I think the impact of mentioning your major down here is that we will have gone through, assuming they read them in this order, we will have gone through, you know, a lot of content until we get to that orienting sentence. Anna (34:58) Go ahead. Ethan Sawyer (35:22) Part of me that wonders if this comes up earlier. Because when you say I want to study environmental studies with a certificate in food, agriculture and climate change, it helps orient me in on your whole application. I'm like, that sort of connects all the things. So it it can work here. But there's just some part of me that wonders, if that were to come earlier, what impact does that have on how you can sort of get into the thing? So we sort of know the realm that we're You know, I sometimes when I read an application, I'm like, where are we? Like you know, where like where like like where is this student? Like, how do I almost like slot the student in mentally among like who they're gonna be in our community? And I think the it's almost like the sooner that I can get this about you, the more that I can sort of start like putting pieces together. And the fact that it comes late means that I'm kind of late in the application, going, So it's kind of like a it's a little bit like a thesis last approach, which I don't think it's wrong. I don't think it's bad. And I want you to think about this because it could be that you you go and you think about this for a couple days and you go, you know what, Ethan? I I think that is the right place. That is where I want to, because it sort of is nice to bring it all together there. I hold that some readers are going to read the intended major right at the start, and some are not. Some are going to start in with your personal statement because that's what they've told me. You know, they Well, I I like to read a personal statement first to really get to know the student. The the last thing I'll say is that in your personal statement. You mentioned you were going to maybe tweak the ending. There are mentions of science, and there's definitely mentions of community. There could be potentially a couple more hints that you drop that were headed in this direction for in terms of your major. So that when they read it, they go, yeah, totally. I saw that. You know, I I should have seen it coming or or something. And these are like tiny moments. And what I mean by this, so here's the seed that I'm gonna plant for your personal statement is what hints and you can maybe look back and be like, okay, I already have two hints. What hints could I drop so that when I say I want to study environmental studies with a certificate in food, agriculture and climate change, the reader will be like, yes, that's both surprising and inevitable. So surprising, but not too surprising because I kind of saw it coming. So there may be like could be two subtle hints that you drop. So when we see that it sort of really pulls things together even more. Anna (37:45) Okay, yeah. I'll do that. Okay. I'm wondering if I'll play around putting this sentence that you highlighted about my major and the certificate I plan on getting at the beginning of my why yale somehow like tie in like and then go into academics for another sentence. And then here I don't even need that sentence. Like I feel like I could just start that paragraph with I'm eager to work at the Yale farm, like Ethan Sawyer (38:10) Totally. Yeah. Ask yourself, do you need to mention Yale Farm twice? Because it could be that Yale Farm is like, you know, you've already done that. So you know, it it it just, you know, it it'll depend on how the essay above goes. Yeah. And and you don't necessarily need to put the course code, you can just cut that tiny note. Anna (38:19) Sure, yeah. Ethan Sawyer (38:32) So there's another slightly longer essay, which we'll get to in just a minute, but let's talk about the short takes. These are right now, as as of this recording, they're two hundred characters long. The first one asks, What inspires you? So I'll let you read this one and then Yeah, go for it. Anna (38:48) Playing among the young musicians of Presto and Vermont Youth strings whose feet don't reach the floor and who laugh at their wrong notes inspires me to embrace the necessity of mistakes in music. Ethan Sawyer (39:02) So I'll just, if I may, just jump in with a thought on this one. I what I like about it is that the embracing the necessity of mistakes in music is a quality that hasn't been explicitly named in the essay. The question I have about it is when I look at your personal statement, you've got you working with like students, you know, you've got your your sort of mentorship energy and your leadership, you know, in the classroom is clear, I think, from the teaching assistant. So As I look at this, I go, is this going to be something that is going to be new or surprising to them? Look, these don't all have to be new or surprising, but part of me kind of feels like we've we've got that and wonders, is there a potential for something else to come in here? So let me say this. If you submit this tomorrow, I'm not mad at it because it's like I think it's cool. But if you're interested in sort of making tweaks here in the final week before the application's due, part of me wants you to like make a list of like, Seven things that inspire you. And then go, okay, are there any of these things that aren't in my application yet that could show another value or could show another quality that isn't coming through as clearly? And then your choice is to either keep what you've got, go with one of the things that you've got, or there's also this other option of you could choose a couple things that inspire you and do a little mini montage. So just to give you an example from a past student, and this is not like the right way to do it. It's just like to, you know, give us another idea or sort or you know, another option. So here's a student from a few years ago. What inspires you? She says, My abuelo's naturalization documents. So connection to family, the smell of petrichor, that's like rain after it's hit, you know, the feeling of placidity after meditating. So the value of like calm. Seeing a sparkle in someone's eyes when they speak about something they genuinely love. So one, two, three, four. There's a there's a little sort of like sampler platter version. So again, I don't hold that this is like the right way or even necessarily a better way, but it's just another way of doing it. So curious how any of that lands for you. Anna (41:15) Yeah, I I agree. Like I feel like this one not only is it maybe showing some low values, I think that I feel like others could write it. It doesn't feel super like there might be other people who, you know, like play with younger musicians and like mentor them and that sort of thing. So I don't I wanna find something potentially more unique. I also struggled. This is a hard one to not Write a cliche, I will say. A lot of things that inspire me, I'm sure inspire so many people. So that was technical. Ethan Sawyer (41:52) It totally. And I think you've done a nice job, but I think you're pointing out something, you know, smart here where it's like, could I copy paste this into someone else's, you know, and change out the name of the, you know, the orchestra? You know, potentially. But that's why I think rather than think about the one perfect thing to write here, I want you to like brainstorm broadly, meaning come up with a bunch of them so that you don't have to put the pressure on yourself of like having to find the one, the one thing, the one inspirational thing to rule them all. And then you can sort of decide if you want to pick a couple or or just one. Okay. Next one. If you could teach any college course, write a book, or create an original piece of art of any kind, what would it be? All right. What do you got? Anna (42:28) Yeah. Roots and Rhines, a cookbook that turns food scraps into flavorful, sustainable meals while helping you save money, reduce waste, and savor every part, from watermelon rind pickles to beet green pesto. Ethan Sawyer (42:53) Nice. All right. What do you think of this one? Anna (42:56) I love this one. I mean, I'm such a cook and like I hope that's like coming through that like I clearly love cooking and I care a lot about reducing food waste and making it more accessible to people. And yeah, I like it. Ethan Sawyer (43:16) Cool. Yeah. I love knowing that about you. Like hearing you say that, that you're a cook and you want to bring that aspect in, I think is is like, let's do it. Let's bring it. Let's figure out to do it. So one, a small note that I'll give on this one. When it comes to teaching a college course, part of me wonders, well, it's it does say write a book or create an original piece of art. So we'll open that up. So option one, keep it as you've got it. It's lovely. No one else is going to be writing roots and rhymes. I do think that. This is going be somewhat uncommon. I don't think many other people would put this. There is some little part of me that goes, okay, when they say college course, is there an opportunity here to potentially throw a spin on this that has us using cooking in a particular way to learn something? So you've kind of got that embedded here. How learning how to save money, learning how to reduce waste, learning how to better savor our meals. But there's some other part of me that's like, Let's imagine that this course is more than just a cooking course or a cookbook in this case, but it's something that was like if let's imagine that this was the textbook for a college course for a second. This is just I'm just riffing here. But what what kind of course would you teach that was both cooking and maybe academic? Anna (44:35) that's hard. I think that what really matters to me is like I think that there's so many people who don't know how to cook or like resort to like maybe like easier, cheaper options for their meals. And I would love for more people to I think more people knowing how to cook and how to like reduce waste and save money in that way, then like that has like such a positive environmental impact and like it it connects back to like climate change and like reducing our environmental footprint. But I think that like also when we're like like eating and cooking with more produce, like we're likely using less plastic, like buying things in less plastic, which is reducing waste as well. And all those things are really important to me. And also like the public health point, like It's ve like it's great for our health as well to be like cooking our own like locally sourced meals. Ethan Sawyer (45:41) This is neat because I was about to ask you why is this so important to you? And you kind of answered it for me, where it seems like what I'm hearing you say is that there's something that we can do locally, like very locally, like in our own kitchens that could potentially have a much bigger impact, not just on our health, but on the environment, on the world at large. Anna (46:04) Yes, totally. Ethan Sawyer (46:06) Okay. Let me read it again. Roots and Rhines, a cookbook that turns food scraps into flavorful, sustainable meals while helping you save money, reduce waste, and savor every part, from watermelon rind pickles to beet green pesto. Okay. I kind of get that from the reduce waste part. There could be some way, and again it's hard with 200 characters, where you hint at why this is such a big deal to you. Because it does seem to have larger impacts, like the dis the choices that we're making in our kitchens. ripple out, you know, the habits that we're creating. Because right now it sounds like a lovely cookbook, you know, but it seems like there's a bigger, there's like a bigger so what here that I'm hearing in what you're saying that you could potentially weave in. So my note here, if I were to make a note, I'm not making any notes in your doc, but if I were to make a note, it would be like, is there something that gives us a bigger sense of the why here, the so what, or why this is such a big deal for you? Anna (47:04) Yeah. Ethan Sawyer (47:06) Other than a family member, here's the next one. Who is someone who's had a significant influence on you? What's been the impact of their influence? All right, let's hear it. Anna (47:14) Rick Bissett, my town's former poet laureate, brought me to Sherwin Farms to write poetry. Sitting in the quiet forest, I learned that the silence of nature offers a clean slate for creativity. Ethan Sawyer (47:29) All what do you think about this one? Anna (47:32) I I like this one. Rick Bassett it was very special. He came to my elementary school and he brought me and like a couple other kids to Shawan Farms and I Shawan Farms was also a place that I thought about writing a personal statement about because I have such this close connection to the farms and it's huge and there's it's open to the public and there's all these expansive forests and I just like I feel like a little kid every time I go and like walk through, and I still go and write poetry sometimes. Ethan Sawyer (48:09) Love that. And I love that you're bringing new parts of yourself here. So the even though you do mention, you know, the farms earlier, the fact that you're writing poetry like gives me that, ooh, that poetic soul. And you use that you say I learned that the silence of nature offers a clean slate for creativity. You bring that quality more fully. And it does light up something for me in the essay where I'm like, this is somebody who's really committed to the craft of writing and spends time in in communion with it and with nature, as it were. So I think this is really bringing something new and something different. Great. I mean it's not totally new, but it lights something up for me in a way that's like affirming for like you as you as an applicant. All right. Last one of the short takes and then we'll do the final larger essay. What's something about you that's not included anywhere else in your application? Okay. What do you got? Anna (48:56) Yeah. Skiing under snow-filled skies, lying in piles of snow after tough wokouts, frosty eyelashes, catching snowflakes with fishnets, born maple pancakes, I exhale at CBU Nordic practice. Ethan Sawyer (49:24) All right. What do you think? Anna (49:26) I don't know. Like I don't know how this is perceived, if it like makes sense. I feel like I wanted to like I liked the short takes that I had read before that were like a list sort of thing. So I tried to do that. And I'm not sure like I'm super good at that, if that's super my thing. But I I do like it. I think skiing is really important to me. So I like that I'm tying that in here. Ethan Sawyer (49:56) I think you are super good at it. And it totally makes sense to me. Meaning like frosty eyelashes, burnt maple pancakes, like you're like summoning these with the senses. You know, I know what that feeling is. I can smell, you know, I can the burnt maple pancake. So you're summoning this as you say it. I think the question I have about this one. So, first of all, the fact that you say that skiing is a big part of your life and it's not mentioned elsewhere in your application, you know, like that's to me like, okay, that is a big candidate for bringing it in. I think where I I sort of go back and forth to be like, should you consider something else or not? Is I I like that you're first of all, I like that you're bringing your athlete side in because that hasn't been mentioned a lot either, you know, and there's something that's meaningful to you about it. The fact that you have tough workouts and get in with that. The fact that you are like, you know, I imagine with others and, you know, having fun with it. Like that all feels really important. The challenge is it's it's it's still a a mini sports essay. And the challenge with these with sports essays is that it's sort of like, well, other students write about sports. So, you know, will it be a differentiator? Maybe not necessarily. It it does everyone have to be, you know, does every single short take have to be something that totally makes you stand out as unique? Not necessarily. And I again, as far as sports essays go, I think it's a good one because I think that nobody else is going write a skiing, a 200 character, you know, skiing short take like this. So I'm gonna kind of leave this one to you, but what I'll say is on the one hand, I think it's really well written. I think it's bringing something about you that's not included elsewhere in your application. And it's, you know, I'll just say those two things mainly. And then on the other side, is there anything else that you would wanna put it up against, as it were, that you might want to include elsewhere in your application? that could help be a a standout because it could be that as they read your application, this is one of the last things they read. And just to sort of have a preliminary conversation about it, do you do you sense that there's anything else that you felt like you wanted to work in that you weren't able to? Anna (52:06) Well, I will just say the reason I chose this one, which maybe I can articulate better, is that I was looking through my whole application and like reading it over and over again, whatever. And I was like, I kept going back to like I was talking to a teacher about this and she was like, So, like, what like what fuels you? Like, how can you do everything? Like, not in like a rude way, like in a very kind way. Like Like how are you able to like mentor students and like play music and do all this stuff? Like what like not only fuels you but like lets you relax and sports really is that for me and I know like and I feel like that's not I think I could warn that in a not super common way. Like for me it's sports is meditative and it's like how I clear my mind and Especially with skiing, it's like I feel like I'm in like a magical wonderland and like I get to do that every day. Like I just feel so lucky. So I wonder if I can tie that in a little bit more and make it a little bit more unique. But for this one, I I definitely struggled with this because not having it anywhere in my application is tough. And I didn't There's a lot of things I could say that are random and fun and like show new values that somehow relate to family. And I didn't necessarily want to re-emphasize that. Ethan Sawyer (53:39) Yeah. I'm curious w what did you why did you leave it out of your application? Why not, for instance, like put a little something in your additional info section? Anna (53:49) About skiing. Yeah. I so I've been skiing since I was really little, especially cross country skiing, but I only joined the team, like the my actual high school team last year. Like formally joined it at least. So I didn't know like I felt like compared to my other things, it wasn't like super sustained commitment and like engagement. And I felt like it was just a weaker point than my other. Aspects of my application. Ethan Sawyer (54:22) Well, I'll say I think this works. And I think if you keep it, again, I'm not mad at it. I think it it's like well written. You could keep it, even if you did tweak it to what you're talking about, I don't I think it's still they're gonna be reading fast. I think it's still gonna read as a skiing, a short skiing essay. And so I don't know that I wouldn't obsess over this is what I'm what I'm saying. Of over like, should you change out the second or third sentence of this? Is it frosty eyelashes or like something else? I you know what I mean. So I would say 'Cause that would that's be what a what I would call a lateral move. So we use this term at C E G where it's like it's a it's not like necessarily better, it's just like an either. Yeah. The thing that I could see potentially doing is you've spent a lot of time doing this. Like you've been doing this your whole life. I could see you saying in the additional info section, skiing involvement and just saying, I've been skiing my whole life, you know, and da da da, you know, whatever you want to say, like short sentence there. And this past year, I formally joined my school ski team. And, you know, here's how I participated in, you know, events, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then then you've got that piece in there. And then you free up a spot here for something else. I don't know if it's like a difference maker in the application. We're we're really getting into the finer points here. But you know, is that a lateral move? Maybe. And you, you know, you have an opportunity to bring one more thing. But these are the kinds of things that you start to think about when you're almost done. You're like, okay. Do I put skiing and additional info and then bring one more thing? Maybe. I'm gonna leave it to you. I'm not gonna say like you definitely should, but I'll just reflect that I think that if this were the end of your application and we're looking for like what is like our final track on the playlist of the, you know, the application, and it ends up being this short take, you know, if it's a sports thing, cool. I mean, it's not just a sports thing, it's like a well written sports thing, but there might be something else. And so what I would say is spend maybe like, I don't know. Five to ten minutes thinking about it. Is there something else that I want to bring in? If so, you could switch it out. But if ultimately you're like, No, I like that. I think I think it's well written. I think you've done a nice job. I wouldn't worry about it too too much. Anna (56:29) Okay. Okay. Sounds good. Ethan Sawyer (56:31) Let's look at the last essay. Reflect on your membership in a community to which you feel connected. Why is this community meaningful to you? You may define community however you like. 400 words. All right, let's hear it. Anna (56:44) How do you pipe a lobster? Esther asks me, panicked, red frosting, dripping down the cupcake wrapper. I laugh and chill her, piping one next to hers. David won't mind if it's messy. He'll get a good laugh out of it. We're baking cupcakes for Temple Sinai's Social Action Committee, a group I've spent countless evenings with, tackling social issues and occasionally frosting lobsters, kosher ones, I promise. Today it is David's 86th birthday. Our meetings often feel like the great British baking show, poet teamwork, poet chaos, and always full of respect for one another. When we carry the cupcakes to the big round table, we start saying, Happy birthday to you. And David, now 86 years young, beams. Between bites, we talk about our weeks, new projects, and the world's messiness. Most of the members are over 60, yet they welcome my teenage voice with genuine curiosity. Around that table, laughter blends with disagreement. Con conversation flows easily between birthdays and big ideas. What connects us is not uniformity, but trust that we can debate without breaking what holds us together. I used to think that agreement was a sign of harmony. In this group, I've learned that arguing can be its own form of love. Our discussions on immigration, poverty, or climate change can be heated but never hostile. We challenge each other's assumptions, ask hard questions, and push one another to see from new perspectives. The word argument often implies anger, yet our arguments are instead acts of respect. They mean we care enough to think deeply and disagree honestly. As the youngest and least experienced in the room, I often contradict the group's wary realism. We can't fix that, someone's size. Our group's too small. They've seen more than I have. But I counter with cautious optimism. We may not solve everything, but our hope is our most necessary tool. Sometimes I lift their outlook, other times they study mine. That back and forth, our thoughtful friction, is how we grow. The social action community is meaningful to me because it is a community where disagreement does not divide us, nor is collaboration seamless or perfect. I learned that community is not about avoiding. with tension, but embracing it with respect and a sprinkle of humor. To argue with people you trust is to believe the world and one another can still be better. Ethan Sawyer (59:18) Oof. From your mouth to God's ears, as they say. Like that's such a b that's such a sermon, that last line. To argue with people you trust is to believe the world and one another can still be better. My God. That's just hitting me like my I'm tearing up just thinking about that. How do you feel about this one? Anna (59:38) What I feel really good. I like the ending. I originally wrote it in a different format. And I started with pretty much defining like Oxford Dish Dictionary's definition of arguing or whatever. And then I went into like pretty much disproving that definition and how like arguing is like I think the definition is something like. At the end it's like comma, like often hostile or something like that. And I was like, no, not necessarily. So then like that was my original way. And then I ended up going with this. And maybe I could time this a little bit better into one sentence. But like I started with like the lobster cupcakes because our group is like very silly. And while like the people I'm working with like have so much experience and it's like sometimes like crazy to me, like that I like get to like work with them and like all the amazing things that they've done in their lives. Like we we're also just like humans and like we just want to like eat cupcakes sometimes. So like I like to start with that because it's like I feel like building that like simple like human connection is so important to then being able to disagree and like trust each other. Ethan Sawyer (1:01:05) Yeah. It's it's really strong. This is like I love the lightness and the just being human together that you have at the start. And I love the way that that's balanced with a with a powerful message here at the end, which is, you know, it's possible to disagree well. And I mean, I think this is like maybe our biggest issue as a you know, an American culture right now is like our inability, you know, in some cases to do that. So I love this. This feels like a you know, an anthem in a way. Exactly. And a beautiful possibility. And I'll I'll say this that I know that you have a couple different options for this prompt to choose from. You know, over the last few years, colleges have added more prompts related to disagreement. And what's an example of a disagreement and how have you navigated it? And you're giving sort of like not at one specific one, but you are answering a different prompt in a great way, which is like When this when our arguments happen, who is gonna be showing up? And the fact that you've gotten some reps, as it were, you know, doing this makes me excited to have you on my campus, no matter where you end up. And so I think you've done a really nice job of giving the reader a sense of who you're gonna be in their community. So it's lovely. If I put my like, okay, is there anything that you know I would say about this? Are there tiny tweaks? Anna (1:02:28) Thank you. Ethan Sawyer (1:02:35) Here's what I'd suggest. One of the things that I'm that you're doing a couple of times, and I want to just kind of like amp up slightly here is there are a couple moments in here where you talk about, you allude to some bigger issues. You mention, for instance, immigration, poverty, or climate change. And you talk about asking hard questions. I think that kind of like when I was suggesting earlier in the, in the that second paragraph of the essay above, where it's like, what would the grad student say here? I think there might be a An opportunity here to just bring in a couple of these, if they're hard questions, a couple little snippets of the conversation, so that we could sense the range of what's the kind of stuff that y'all get into. And you don't need to get super detailed. You don't need to make like two paragraphs out of this, but I think just a couple examples of those will help ping for us. you know, Anna is not not only willing to like have difficult conversations, but difficult conversations around. Potentially like, you know, and you're you're hinting at it already, at these, you know, stigmatized these you know these topics that are really hard to talk about. And getting into the nuances just a little bit could kind of let us know the kinds of conversations that you're prepared to have in a slightly more specific way. Does that make sense? Yeah. I think what you can trim, I noticed the the theme of, you know, going into conversations and Anna (1:03:54) Yeah, totally. Ethan Sawyer (1:04:02) feeling like argument isn't bad, basically, that argument can be productive. I think that theme repeats just a couple of times in here. And so if you're trying to look later of like what can I trim, it could be that one or two of those mentions could get trimmed. But the the tweaks that I'm suggesting are like a couple sentences so that we go, dang, you know, wow, they really, they really got into some stuff. Anna (1:04:26) Yeah. Ethan Sawyer (1:04:27) But it's it's subtle. And it's what I'm what I'm doing is I'm like encouraging like little sprinkles of like w I I guess broadly speaking I'll call it like nerdiness or intellectual curiosity or something like that. So I wanna just zoom back for a second and see how you're doing. How how was this? Anna (1:04:46) This is super helpful. I think that all your points were like of different parts of my application that I felt were missing something or needed a little bit of tweaking. So I'm excited to do some editing tomorrow. Ethan Sawyer (1:05:01) Great. I trust you all. And I I I sort of implied this at the start, but I want to make it explicit. You've done such wonderful work here. That these I'm I'm really, you know, we're putting some finer points on these things, but but I I feel like it's like, you know, 90% there. So, you know, yes, spend some time over this next week working on these, but you've done such a lot of work to get here. So I just want to like congratulate you on on the hard work and say kudos to all of the work that that that put you in this position to have such a Such a solid, you know, application that you're submitting. Anna (1:05:34) Thank you so much. Ethan Sawyer (1:05:36) I'm happy to take a final look at this. If you wanna, you know, in the next few days, just shoot me over an email and say, Hey, Ethan, what you think? And I'll take a look at it. Yeah, I'm excited to see where you end up. I'm excited to see what school gets Anna, because whether it's Yale or some other school, like they're they're they're getting a gem here in in you. And and I I just think you're gonna bring so much to to wherever whichever community you end up in. Anna (1:05:58) Thank you. It was so great to talk about all this. Ethan Sawyer (1:06:02) Yeah. Thanks for doing this. Thanks friends as ever for listening. You'll find the show notes at collegeessaguy.com slash podcast, including the text of these essays, so you can check them out for yourself. If you're interested in more from CEG, you can sign up for anything at collegeesguy.com. We'll share with you our latest resources, our upcoming free live events, and lots more. Thanks, friends, and stay curious.
